It’s Halloween! And while I’m not pagan, I can’t help but love celebrating Halloween, complete with costumes and parties and spooky fun. (And paddle boarding dressed as a witch!)
As a sex coach, I really like Halloween for a couple special reasons. One, it’s a holiday that encourages people to role-play and explore a side of themselves that doesn’t predominate in their normal lives, which I think is healthy. And two, it normalizes the wearing of costumes.
Have you and your lover experimented with costumes for sex?
If no, then this weekend, please! Please, I beg you, give it a try!
I know, I know, people trying to turn just about anything into a “sexy” costume for Halloween is sort of a joke. But why not get in on the joke and go all out? Dress up as praying mantises… with one of you missing your head!
While that one might be hard to pull off (literally and figuratively), other costume play is easy and accessible. Does your lover need some sexual healing from a doctor or nurse? Or are you an unruly student in need of teacherly discipline? Maybe you’re you a sexy purring kitty that just wants to be petted? Or does your Catholic-educated girlfriend have a kinky religious fantasy that needs exploring?
Don’t be afraid to explore the darker side of your sensuality.
As I’ve written about before, the human brain craves novelty and adventure, and costumes are a fun, lively, relatively easy way to incorporate that into your sex life. Getting to see your lover in a new way is exciting!
While a lot of the couples I work with already engage in this kind of play, but some don’t. If you’re among the latter, now’s the time to give it a whirl.
This weekend – and always – embrace creative fun, in and out of the bedroom.
And tag me in photos of what costumes you come up with!