The more we worry about having an orgasm, the more stressed our body becomes and stressed bodies have a hard time relaxing, which is a key ingredient for freeing the female orgasm.
Here are a few simple ideas that will get you on the road to having an orgasm.
1. Forget about having an orgasm!
There are hundreds of erogenous zones on the body. Spend an hour or two with your partner taking turns just touching all the different parts of each other’s bodies, and leave your genitals completely out of the picture.
2. Touch your partner as if you were an alien and had never seen a human body before.
Discover all the nooks and crannies, go slow and savor each sensation. Soft fleshy parts can be especially pleasurable. Explore earlobes, cheeks, inside of arms, neck, backs of knees, belly, in between fingers and toes. What’s your newest erogenous zone? What’s your favorite?
Whenever something feels really delicious, allow yourself to completely feel it in your body, and take some long deep breaths while your partner continues the touch.
3. Keep breathing and focus on what you’re feeling in your body as you are being touched.
The key here is to stay out of your head and completely focused on the sensations in your body. Maintaining a deep, steady breath will allow you to stay in your body.
4. Find your inner animal:
Try making animal sounds such as roaring or growling. The deeper and more guttural the sound you make, the more you will charge up your sexual energy. Many women I work with find an incredible release of energy when I coax them to make some noises during arousal. Louder and more sustained noises during high arousal will move sexual energy around the body, freeing up the female orgasm.
5. Dance your way:
Dancing with your partner in a fun and sexy way before lovemaking. It will help both of you get into your bodies and sets the mood for sex. I call this the Warm Up Dance, but it’s not the same as the Orgasm Dance. Moving your body during arousal increases your sexual energy and helps free up orgasms. Feeling an arousal rhythm in your body allows you to sink really deeply into the experience and spread sexual energy throughout your body.
Let me know which of these tips help you relax and free your orgasm! I would love to hear all about in my all women’s Facebook, Girlfriend Sex Talk!