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Clearing Space to Welcome Love

Clearing Space to Welcome Love

The view from the King Size Canopy bed in my Passionate Intimacy Retreat chalet

Do you ever walk into a room and feel something off, and just want to walk back out?  If so, you might be sensing negative energy in the room.  It’s not something measurable, but if you ask a cat or dog about it, they’ll tell you (in their own language) how real that energy is.  Some spaces have warm, welcoming energy; some have clear, clean, creative energy; some have something darker, heavy, sad, or fearful – maybe the energy remaining from a fight, or unkind words still lingering in the air, even months or years after they were spoken.

If you are single and looking for love, I highly recommend performing a space clearing ritual in order to clear any negative energy from your home and make room for positive energy to flow into it.  To do this, I often suggest a few things:

Let Go of the Past

Gather things from past relationships and donate them, sell them, or, if it feels right to you, burn them or put them in the trash.  If a thing is functional (say, a nice chef knife, or a lovely jacket given to you by an ex), and you like it (and there’s no lingering negative energy from that relationship) it can be fine to keep it.

If you have photos of your ex or mementos that you’re not ready to let go of, then put those things away in a box and close it up, put it in a place where you won’t see it.  If you haven’t already done so, go through your photos on your phone and delete most of those of your ex, unless they spark joy to you or record significant moments in your life.  At the very least, un-favorite those photos so they don’t show up prominently in the “memories” our phones show us.

Declutter to Make Actual Space

Declutter and make some actual, physical space.  This doesn’t mean you have to become a minimalist, but it does mean you should carefully consider the things you have around you.  As Marie Kondo suggests, if an item no longer sparks joy, if it no longer serves you, thank it for its service and let it go.  Donate it to a thrift shop, sell it online, put it in the bin – whatever it takes to get it out of your space.  In order to welcome new things into our lives, we have to create actual space for them to exist.  If you want a live-in partner, clear out half of your drawers and half of your closet.  If you want a boyfriend or girlfriend, clear out at least one drawer for them, and do it now; don’t wait until they show up.

Consider – and Reconsider – Your Art

If you have art or other images, statues, etc., in your space that depict a single person, consider putting those items away or letting them go completely.  What we depict around us is the energy we attract into our lives, so having a lot of depictions of single people will attract more single-ness to our lives.  Do you have art that shows happy couples?  (They don’t even have to be human couples – one of my favorite pieces, which I have displayed in my Passionate Intimacy Retreat chalet, is of two dinosaurs having sex! You can find a photo of it here, in Matt Reddy‘s gallery.)  Of course, if two dinosaurs having sex isn’t your style, then opt for what is your style!  What kind of partner do you want to attract?  Can you find any imagery that shows the partnership you want?


Sweep, vacuum, dust, mop, launder all your bedding, wash the windows, dust the blinds, clear out all the dust and grime from the past so that your space sparkles with the new love energy you want to invite in.  Open the windows and let fresh air in.  Make your home a place where you (and your new lover) will want to be stuck inside!

Energetic Clearing

The last step is to perform a kind of energetic space-clearing ritual to help dispel any lingering negative energy in your space.  Some people use a bell, or singing bowls, to clear the space with sound.  Others like to use sage or other herbs to burn and clear the space with smoke.

I hope these tips are helpful and that the universe responds by sending you lots of love and the connection you desire.  If you want further help or coaching, please reach out and we can discuss how I can help.

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