When it comes to orgasms, breath is your best friend! Breath not only helps you to move sexual energy out of your body, to allow an orgasm to flow, but it also is a catalyst to create sexual energy in your body.
Breath, sound, and movement are the three basic tantric principles to connect and stimulate sexual energy. It’s the fuel that feeds the fire.
Using breath is like putting high octane gasoline in your car. It is the most potent and powerful form of energy that you can access.
Deep belly breathing activates the Vagus nerve, a major cranial nerve that runs through your entire body and connects to all of your vital organs, including your skin.
It is one of the reasons that deep belly breathing creates tingling and sensation in your body, often hands, feet, and face.
Deep belly breathing also helps your body to relax. This is one of the keys to having an orgasm since orgasm happens at the intersection of high arousal and high relaxation.
Many people breathe incorrectly, contracting their belly on the inhale, rather than on the exhale.
The proper way to breathe is to expand your belly on your inhale and contract on the exhale.
Energy orgasms through breath should start with deep belly breathing into each of the seven chakras (or energy centers) to awaken and activate each of the chakras.
Here are some key takeaways if you want to practice having an energy orgasm:
Use very quick breaths rather than a deep relaxing breaths.
You can definitely have an energy orgasm from deeper breath work, but the quickest way to actually generate orgasmic energy from breathing is short, quick breaths.
Each time you move to the next energy center or chakra, bring the energy and breath with you.
Start breathing from the perineum area (base or 1st chakra) and move up sequentially to the 2nd chakra (genitals), 3rd chakra (solar plexus/belly), 4th chakra (heart center), 5th chakra (throat), 6th chakra (space between eyebrows or third eye) and 7th chakra (top of head).
Incorporate contractions of the PC or kegel muscle in your breathing.
This is a key ingredient and it's considerably harder to generate this type of energy orgasm without it.
PC muscle contractions help to generate sexual energy in our genitals and connecting with this sexual energy intensifies the orgasmic release.
Here is a great article on Learning To Love Your Love Muscle, it walks through some good information about how to use PC muscles and exercises you can do to strengthen the PC muscle
Check out this video by my colleague Martha Lee in Singapore. She demonstrates how to achieve an energy orgasm through using your breath.
You will likely have to do this intense breathing twice as long as Martha since she has a lot of experience with breathwork. However, anyone can have breath energy orgasms with practice.
After you’ve done the breathing for at least 7-10 minutes, do a "big draw" breath.
This involves taking in three deep breaths, and holding the last breath while you are squeezing your PC muscle and squeezing all of your muscles, including scrunching up your face and fists.
Hold this breath for at least 30 seconds and then release.
Don’t get discouraged! At first this might feel confusing since there’s a bit of multi-tasking going on.
After a bit of practice, the coordination of the breathing and PC muscle contractions will become much easier and you will be able to do it without thinking about it!
You will have taken your first step to having great energetic Tantric sex!
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Sex & Intimacy Coach, Best Selling Author and Your Guide To Healing Yourself With Sex, Awakening Your Pleasure and Living An Orgasmic Life